Melilyn.com

… Jeapardy music plays …

Okay, seriously! But we are almost done painting. Only the trim in the hallway and a couple of doors! And the carport is almost all of the way done, and we’re ready to go crazy first thing tomorrow morning, getting everything moved in. Hooray! It’ll take us a week, but I think we’ll be able to do it.

I’m starting to look past the new year now. Not thinking about Hanukkah, not thinking about the new house… but thinking about where I’m going to apply for a job next [Braum’s application today!], and how I need to get together with some of my friends. I’m trying to convince Amanda to spend a week in Oklahoma next year, and I’m also trying to rationalize a road trip to Pennsylvania or Texas or both, once I get my liscense. Oh yeah, I’m planning on getting that too. And I’m going to go back to “school”… basically, getting my German back up to par.

Although you don’t know HOW much I’m debating at least a minor in webdesign. Really and truly. OH!!!! Sam Lincicome [known as the ‘VOICE’ on the majority of the Lion and Lamb teaching CD’s] wants to put up a website, offering voice-over services, that kind of thing, and wants to know if I’m willing to help him. Um, yeah!! Now that I’m learning PHP [expect a truly awesome web layout after the move-in], I could probably make professional websites… right?

Re-evaluating what I want to do with my life. I truly am.

I really really need prayer right now. For more financial reasons than I care to think about, and also because of being too busy to try and rectify that, it looks like once again, I’m not off to college just yet. It looks like it’s going to have to wait until the Fall 06 semester this time… and I’m ending up taking a year off, which I never wanted to do in the first place. Homeschooling senior year was so stress-free and challenge-free that, educationally, it’s the only year I needed off.

But my bank account says something different. So does my lack of scholarships. Heh. I’m going to get a job the minute life calms down enough, and I’m going to work my butt off and just pay for college myself. Forget scholarships. Forget my trust fund. And above all, forget my grandfather.

Life is just in such horrible limbo right now. Some days I feel like I’m not eighteen at all, that I’m only fourteen and trying to make sense of the grown up world… but some days I feel like I’m fifty already and I’ve missed out on something terribly important. I can’t tell you how many nights this past week I’ve cried myself to sleep… not just because I don’t know where my life is going, but because I am disappointing so many people.

Hanukkah just keeps getting closer and closer and closer… and for the most part that’s really exciting, but at the same time… I hope we get moved by then!! But today we finally banished the last yellow wall. All of the walls have been painted… hooray! Now there’s just some trim and doors to do, and Dad also walled in the carport and painted it this weekend and today. So this is what has to be done by Hanukkah:

• Trim in five rooms
• Six or seven doors
• Insulation and sheet rock [or drywall] in the carport
• MOVING IN!!

That isn’t too, too bad… but look at the calendar. Hanukkah is coming fast.

I’ve been thinking about a lot of things, but I don’t think I’ll say anything unless I make a private post later. Other than that, I’ve been really busy. So busy I keep forgetting to email friends, which is not cool. So bug me to keep updating you guys, okay?